We all desire supportive, fulfilling relationships. But often our expectations undermine our

connections. Today I’ll share insights on the biggest mistake we make in relationships and how

to strengthen bonds by adjusting your mindset.

As shared by Dr. Zoe Shaw, the #1 error is expecting others to show up in ways misaligned

from their true selves. We get frustrated when people don’t think, act or prioritize like we do.

The core issue is that we fail to appreciate differences and instead want people to be more like

us. This causes resentment, disappointment and strain.

There are two parts to fixing this:

Accept Innate Differences

We all have distinct personalities and priorities. What energizes you may drain another. One

person may feel valued by quality time, another by acts of service. Neither approach is right or

wrong – diversity brings balance.

Rather than wishing people matched your style, take time to understand what makes them tick.

Learn their communication approach. Ask what makes them feel appreciated. Then set

expectations based on who they inherently are.

Don't Expect Others to Emulate Your Growth

As advocates for personal growth, we spend lots of energy bettering ourselves. The danger is

assuming others want the same changes. Just because you crave more adventure doesn't

mean others should too.

Be careful projecting your improvement path. Respect people’s boundaries and desire for self-

defined growth. Lead by example rather than critique. Some accommodation in relationships is

reasonable, but forcing someone to fit your evolving mold will strain your connection.

The key to nurturing relationships is giving grace for others to show up as their authentic selves.

Get curious about what makes them who they are. Uplift their strengths instead of criticizing

weaknesses. Adapt how you connect instead of expecting people to match your style.

This empathy and flexibility will enrich your relationships, influence and leadership.

If this resonated and you want to learn more about strengthening connections, be sure to check

out the video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gdSvwjmcnM where I dive deeper into

this topic. Investing in understanding the psychology behind your relationships is one of the best

things you can do for yourself and those you care about.